Day fifteen.

Sometimes I forget when I work I am being paid an hourly wage. It can get frustrating not working the money making shifts, say for instance, a Friday night. I try to work as much as I can. I tell the other servers that if they need to get rid of a shift I will take it. The point of this game I'm playing is to make as much money as I can, clearly, the only way to do that is to work all the time. 

I offered my serving services to no avail but that didn't mean I wasn't needed in the kitchen as an expeditor.  Tonight I was the Expo, the person as I've mention before, who organizes the orders for each table. It was a shit show tonight. There is no other way to explain the anarchy that took place at (insert real name here) this very eve. A shit show. 

On a side note, my mom told me I should stop swearing when I write. The rule of thumb is that the only time swearing is appropriate is when you stub your toe. My mom hates swearing. I told her I have to swear in lieu of discussing my intervenes drug use and unprotected sex. She didn't think that was funny.

When I work expo I don't care if I hurt someone's feelings. I don't care if someone thinks I'm rude. My job is to make sure people get to eat what they ordered, how they ordered it, as fast as I can. When a person comes to (insert real name here) there is no excuse for their food to arrive at the table, cold, with the wrong side, 50 minutes after ordering. Sad thing is, that is exactly what happening tonight. As a server working the expo station I can empathize with both the kitchen and the servers. Keeping tables full of hungry strangers happy when their food is taking almost an hour to get to them is exhausting. How difficult is it to make a damn chicken caesar salad? But at the same time, I feel for the cooks that are getting dozens and dozens of orders thrust upon them all at once.

It's on the cusp of a no win situation when a restaurant gets slammed. I say the cusp because there is in fact a winner in this scenario. The winner is the customer. Most times, a manager will comp the food. A comp is when food is taken care of on a bill. That is to say, the customer eats for free. If food isn't comped then a discount or perhaps a hefty gift certificate is given out to compensate for the ridiculous wait time.

Restaurants want your business. If your food comes out wrong or cold or late say something when the manager or supervisor visits your table. If you have a legit complaint you may be able to score yourself some free goods. What's the worst thing that could happen? You get an apology? Just remember the Golden Rule: treat others as you would have them treat you. Be polite. 

Three consecutive hours of getting slammed has earned me an adult beverage. 

Day five.

Sunday night and again tonight I am not serving but rather working in the kitchen as an expediter or an expo. An expo is basically the person who makes sure there is a lemon wedge on your fish or a sprinkle of cilantro on your salad. He or she is the go-between of the kitchen and the front of house. Sure, not all restaurants have an expo but for the ones that do the job is all the same. Get the right right food out to the right tables so that it looks good and it's hot. 

Sunday night I somehow defied the laws of physics when I was wiping off a plate to be sent out. The plate broke I saved the steak but when anything glass breaks around food it means the grub must be chucked. No one wants to run the risk of a bloody massacre. Picture a tiny bit of broken glass stuck in the food then tearing apart the diner's esophagus to that of ground beef. A highly unlikely scenario but you never know. In a circumstance like this, dropping food on the ground or breaking a plate, the kitchen has to remake the dish and sometimes the whole table. Almost always the server whose table has now been delayed gets pissed off and that generally effects how much I get tipped out at the end of the night. She was okay with the remake since her table really appreciated us not sending out a glass shard steak. 

I think that it was later on I told her to "shut up and get out of the kitchen if all you're gonna do is stand there and get in my way" that, let's call her Dumb-dumb, decided not to tip me out. Dumb-dumb is a prime example of what not to do as a server. I will get to some of her greater performances one of these days. 

I don't mind working expo as a favour every now and then but the problem is that in doing so, I am losing money. A night working in the kitchen means I don't make any tips other that when I get tipped out by the servers at the end of the night and those tips are definitely lacking. Between the nine servers working that night I made $8 as opposed to the $40 or so I would have made on a slow Sunday night. 

I don't mind working the occasional expo shift since it is a welcome break from being out front. I get to wear jeans and a hat, joke around with the line cooks and yell at people. I think I should be making more money an hour if I work an expo shift to compensate for what I'm not making out front.  

So in the interest of keeping track of my tips here are Sunday night and yesterday's stats:


(Sunday)

• hours worked 3.38   
• tips earnerd $8.10

(Monday)

• total sales $147
• tips earned $21.50
• hours worked 1.98
• tip out $4.41

We'll see how I do today.